Outside my kitchen window pane

I always spend my time looking out at my kitchen window pane every morning half sleep and half awake like I could predict the weather what is going to be like this afternoon or tomorrow; of course, i won't be able to predict the weather or having the senses like an animal.  As I look out the window, I pause and think how the weather changes everyday, every hour, every minute comparing to our life how we all change everyday but something in us could be controlled but some we can't do anything about it like our ages. What could we do to make this world more beautiful? Do we need to dress up beautiful clothing? I think we all do but not dressing up physically. We all need to dress up spiritually' having a good heart, love, and sincere.

I don't know what is my purpose of writing on this post today. I just think if we all love each other with a sincere heart; we could have a heaven on earth.

Love & Sacrifice

For the past couple weeks, I have been thinking of what my life is going to be in the future. I wondered if I could find the right one to be my best friend forever, or if that person would find me. I am certain that the Lord will guide me as long as I am faithful.

Anyway, I came across someone that I never knew before, actually I know that person before int he spirit world I suppose. I am amazed how this person has such love and sacrifice to the spouse who is sick in the hospital bed that this person will always with the spouse no matter what happens. I probably couldn't explain how much I admire this person in one page on this blog. This person inspires me to do my best to be better person. I have felt the Christlike in this person. I wish I had an opportunity to marry to a person like this person.

I love to look at the picture I took during the hike in 2009. What is actually beyond that endless space?

Childhood continue..

Recently, I have been thinking about going back to school. Well, I do have a degree from Thailand but it's nothing when I am here in the States. Right now, I am not back in school yet.. Of course, I have no money. 2011 is my starting year, starting from nothing. I took a semester at UVU and after the separation with my ex I stopped going to school. Pretty much I have to deal with my emotion breakdown and have to concentrate on the job I had at the time. I had moving around wasting my time and saving money just to try recovering from the heart breaking didn't work and now I am back to Utah again.

I recall what mom had told us when we were very young. She said that she had no any heirloom to give the only thing she could give us her children is an Education. Mom always says that we, human being, both die rich and die poor; we won't be able to take any processions along with us after this life but the only thing we can take is knowledge or what we have learned in this life. Education is one of the most precious treasure!, mom always reminds us.

My parents have been working hard through out their lives. They are mainly working as teachers. Mom teaches Social Science. Dad teaches Physics.  They both always have side jobs. Dad does welding and other construction after school. Mom used to bake and cook some food whatever people ordered to sell at her school. It takes her almost 20 yrs until she stopped baking and cooking food to sell. Now she has another side job open a dormitory for college girl at the house and sells Life Insurance whenever she has time to do.

Dad loves drinking which I don't like about him; other than that he is a great dad if he's not drunk.

My parents taught us to not look down others who are less fortunate. They said what we would feel if other people who are more well being than us look down to us.

I would consider our family not a middle class family in Thailand but poor.

Well, right now I am trying to figure out what should I do to get back to school again. I still do need to save money for a back up in case I am out of job (so I would have a place to sleep, some food to eat) ; especially, in this kind of economy crisis around the world... many people may think that I can get the loan. yes, of course I can get the loan but I still need to have an emergency money too.

I think I'd better go to bed soon. Will write more next time.

Childhood

Jan & Me (Jul)

I have recently been thinking about my childhood of how simple the life is. My family is not rich. Both of my parents are high school teachers. They are working hard to create a better life for their children. We would consider our family of non-materialistic family. I recall that we don't have a car, a bike, nor a motor-bike because we didn't have a lot of money but we were happy.

Last night, I was not able to fall asleep. I felt so lonely. Wanna have someone to cuddle with..lol.... anyway, It time to go back to work now. I will be back and write more about my childhood and what my mom has been teaching us as a child.